Ghosting. Painful at work or home

Ghosting has become a modern default: someone shows interest, asks questions, even makes plans, then stops replying with no explanation. In work, it can look like a decision-maker requesting a proposal, setting a follow-up, and then vanishing while staying active on LinkedIn. In personal life, it can be a friend who keeps saying “let’s meet” but never commits, or a message thread that just dies. The emotional impact is real: frustration, self-doubt, and the constant loop of “Did I do something wrong?” Because ghosting removes context, the person left behind can only guess, and that uncertainty often stings more than a clear no.

The episode digs into why ghosting is so common now, especially in places like Facebook Marketplace and online selling. The barrier to entry is low: it costs nothing to enquire, agree a price, ask for an address, and promise you are “on the way”. When a seller has dragged an item out of storage, cleaned it, waited for hours, and turned away other buyers, that silence wastes time and breaks trust. The psychology is messy: people like the feeling of having options, they may get distracted, or they may find a better deal and avoid an awkward message. Yet a quick, polite update protects basic human decency and keeps online communities usable.

Workplace ghosting adds another layer because it involves professional etiquette, leadership standards, and sometimes power. Candidates report being ghosted by recruiters; recruiters report being ghosted by candidates. When organisations cut staff and hiring becomes frantic, the temptation is to ignore rather than close the loop. But leaders build reputations through small acts: acknowledging messages, setting expectations, and giving a short, clear response. For consultants and small business owners, there is also a practical lesson: do not hand over your best thinking or proprietary information to someone who will not even confirm next steps. Clear boundaries are part of good business development and self-respect.

The hardest part is admitting that nearly everyone has ghosted at some point, often to avoid hurting someone. Ending friendships, declining invitations, or stepping away from people you no longer enjoy can feel cruel when said plainly. The episode explores that tension: honesty versus kindness, directness versus needless harm. A useful guide is intent and impact: are you avoiding a difficult moment, or protecting safety and wellbeing? Sometimes a brief, respectful message is the most humane option. The closing takeaway is simple: just because there are no consequences does not mean you have free rein. Character shows up in the small choices, including whether you “return the trolley” and whether you choose clarity over silence.

Listen here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2607508/episodes/18952523